Californians

[kathydwells]

So as not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, and Texan jokes, you know you're from California if:

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercing's and none are visible.

2. You make over $400,000 and still can't afford a house.

3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Flower.

5. You can't remember . . is pot illegal?

6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian!

8. You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

9. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

10. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

11. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney.

12. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

13. You can't remember . . . .is pot illegal?

14. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH."

15. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cells or pagers.

16. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather related accidents.

17. HEY!!!! IS pot illegal????

18. Both you AND your dog have therapists.

19. The Terminator is your governor.

20. If you drive illegally, they take your driver's license away. If you're here illegally, they want to give you one.

 

[dbuck]

Those are good.

 

[Mermaid]

Those are good ones! In Indiana, we get "STORM WATCH" the minute a snowflake or two drifts down from the sky. Does this mean we're pseudo-California cool?

 

[Cil]

Too funny!

 

[Gypsea]

How true!!!

 

[seagrovelover]

Love this one!!!! :clap_1:

 

[Miss Kitty]

:clap_1:

 

[audie]

Those are good ones! In Indiana, we get "STORM WATCH" the minute a snowflake or two drifts down from the sky. Does this mean we're pseudo-California cool?

sorry mer, i think it means we're dorks !

 

[DBOldford]

Geez, guys...sure glad I'm not blonde anymore! We got a good laugh out of this. Seeing that there are two sides to every story, consider the following.

(1) We have lived in CA for over 25 years and have never lived further than three miles from our place of business. And in spite of the high housing prices, we have seen far more appreciation on our CA homes than on any other properties we've owned in five key states. (And we require affordable housing of developers, along with requiring them to finance infrastructure.)

(2) When the weather stations have a "weather alert," they don't mean oil slicks on the highway. They mean the freeway itself is under 10 feet of water. I once defied a weather report while living in Southern CA and ended up in Pacific Palisades, blocked by a boulder almost the size of my bedroom and water washing over the hood of my car. That was the trip that I also learned one should always travel with one's cat in a contained pet carrier. (This was in my 20s, so give me a break, cat lovers!)

(3) You can, indeed run into George Clooney at your local coffee house (we don't allow Starbucks or other chains in our town). You can also end up at a dinner party or a charity board meeting with a guy who robbed thousands of people of their corporate pensions and now lives in a great house here in town. (We may get O.J. Simpson yet!)

(4) You don't necessarily have to make $400K to buy a house in CA, but you might make it after you sell the house, if you reinvest wisely.

(5) People in our town can go on vacation for weeks without locking their doors and we can walk anywhere in town at any hour with no fear of crime. You can watch your local City Council or Planning Commission meeting on closed circuit tv and run down there in your house slippers if you hear something that blows your skirt up. You can also pick your salad fixin's out of your back yard. (So can the deer.)

Finally, for all its stereotypes, CA is a wonderful place to live. If you like living in CA, you will never be satisfied with any other place. We have wonderfully mild weather in spite of the storms. We don't have hurricanes. Give me an earthquake any day, by comparison, because it's over before you start to worry and you don't have to watch news coverage about the earthquake for a week before it strikes. Our utilities are laughingly low and so are grocery prices. Our property taxes are protected by Prop 13. We offer more job opportunities than virtually anywhere, along with great universities and community colleges that are practically free for residents. We have the BEST food and restaurants, aside from some parts of Italy. We are real sports, with a good sense of self deprecating humor. And we know how to have a good time and make no apologies for it!

 

[Kimmifunn]

Donna...I was supposed to be in LA tomorrow through the weekend. Had to cancel due to the impending strike here at the store. But I'm going to live out there sooner rather than later. That's my next move...and I can't wait!