kathydwells
Darlene is my middle name, not my nickname
I won't be around Friday, I am heading down to Old Town, Fla to visit my daddy. He will be 75 on Sunday. I will wave at all you locals, and all of you down there for your dreaded October month, as I am heading East!!!
CAKE OR BED?
A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL
GAME WHEN HIS WIFE INTERRUPTS, HONEY, COULD
YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY?
IT'S BEEN FLICKERING FOR WEEKS NOW.
HE LOOK AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY, FIX THE LIGHTS NOW?
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE GE WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO.
FINE, THEN THE WIFE ASKS, WELL THEN, COULD YOU
FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? IT WON'T CLOSE RIGHT.
TO WHICH HE REPLIED, FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR?
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE WESTINGHOUSE WRITTEN
ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO.
FINE, SHE SAYS THEN YOU COULD AT LEAST FIX THE
STEPS TO THE FRONT DOOR? THEY ARE ABOUT TO BREAK.
I'M NOT A DA&% CARPENTER AND I DON'T WANT TO FIX STEPS.
HE SAYS, DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE ACE HARDWARE
WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU.
I'M GOING TO THE BAR!!!!
SO HE GOES TO THE BAR AND DRINKS FOR A
COUPLE OF HOURS...........HE STARTS TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT
HOW HE TREATED HIS WIFE, AND DECIDES TO GO HOME.
AS HE WALKS INTO THE HOUSE HE NOTICES THAT
THE STEPS ARE ALREADY FIXED.
AS HE ENTERS THE HOUSE, HE SEES THE HALL LIGHT
IS WORKING.
AS HE GOES TO GET A BEER, HE NOTICES THE FRIDGE
DOOR IS FIXED.
HONEY, HE ASKS, HOW'D ALL THIS GET FIXED?
SHE SAID, WELL, WHEN YOU LEFT I SAT OUTSIDE AND CRIED.
JUST THEN A NICE YOUNG MAN ASKED ME WHAT WAS WRONG,
AND I TOLD HIM.
HE OFFERED TO DO ALL THE REPAIRS, AND ALL I HAD TO DO WAS EITHER
GO TO BED WITH HIM OR BAKE A CAKE.
HE SAID,SO WHAT KIND OF CAKE DID YOU BAKE?
SHE REPLIED, HELLOOOOO....
DO YOU SEE BETTY CROCKER WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO!
CAKE OR BED?
A HUSBAND IS AT HOME WATCHING A FOOTBALL
GAME WHEN HIS WIFE INTERRUPTS, HONEY, COULD
YOU FIX THE LIGHT IN THE HALLWAY?
IT'S BEEN FLICKERING FOR WEEKS NOW.
HE LOOK AT HER AND SAYS ANGRILY, FIX THE LIGHTS NOW?
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE GE WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO.
FINE, THEN THE WIFE ASKS, WELL THEN, COULD YOU
FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR? IT WON'T CLOSE RIGHT.
TO WHICH HE REPLIED, FIX THE FRIDGE DOOR?
DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE WESTINGHOUSE WRITTEN
ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO.
FINE, SHE SAYS THEN YOU COULD AT LEAST FIX THE
STEPS TO THE FRONT DOOR? THEY ARE ABOUT TO BREAK.
I'M NOT A DA&% CARPENTER AND I DON'T WANT TO FIX STEPS.
HE SAYS, DOES IT LOOK LIKE I HAVE ACE HARDWARE
WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO.
I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOU.
I'M GOING TO THE BAR!!!!
SO HE GOES TO THE BAR AND DRINKS FOR A
COUPLE OF HOURS...........HE STARTS TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT
HOW HE TREATED HIS WIFE, AND DECIDES TO GO HOME.
AS HE WALKS INTO THE HOUSE HE NOTICES THAT
THE STEPS ARE ALREADY FIXED.
AS HE ENTERS THE HOUSE, HE SEES THE HALL LIGHT
IS WORKING.
AS HE GOES TO GET A BEER, HE NOTICES THE FRIDGE
DOOR IS FIXED.
HONEY, HE ASKS, HOW'D ALL THIS GET FIXED?
SHE SAID, WELL, WHEN YOU LEFT I SAT OUTSIDE AND CRIED.
JUST THEN A NICE YOUNG MAN ASKED ME WHAT WAS WRONG,
AND I TOLD HIM.
HE OFFERED TO DO ALL THE REPAIRS, AND ALL I HAD TO DO WAS EITHER
GO TO BED WITH HIM OR BAKE A CAKE.
HE SAID,SO WHAT KIND OF CAKE DID YOU BAKE?
SHE REPLIED, HELLOOOOO....
DO YOU SEE BETTY CROCKER WRITTEN ON MY FOREHEAD?
I DON'T THINK SO!
