Friday Funny (since Kdwells is gone today)

[Beachlover2]

For the ladies - (all in fun guys)


After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. "So, how is everything going?" inquired God.. "It is all so beautiful, God," she replied. "The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem. It is these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They are a real pain," reported Eve.
And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc..........she felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more "symmetrically balanced," as she put it.



"That is a fair point," replied God, "But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away." And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes. Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden. "Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?"



"Just fantastic," she replied, "But for one oversight on your part. You see, all! the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone."



God thought for a moment and said, "You know, Eve, you are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you.. Now let's see............where did I put the useless boob?"



Now doesn't THAT make more sense than that stuff about the rib?

 

[Landlocked]

Oldie but goodie:


A guy rushes into a bar, orders six expensive thirty-year-
old single malts and has the bartender line them up in front
of him. Then, without pausing, he downs each one.

"Whew," the bartender remarks, "you seem to be in a hurry."

"You would be, too, if you had what I have."

"What do you have?" the bartender sympathetically asks.

"Fifty cents."

 

[jessifunn]

Oldie but goodie:


A guy rushes into a bar, orders six expensive thirty-year-
old single malts and has the bartender line them up in front
of him. Then, without pausing, he downs each one.

"Whew," the bartender remarks, "you seem to be in a hurry."

"You would be, too, if you had what I have."

"What do you have?" the bartender sympathetically asks.

"Fifty cents."

i have a friend that would do something like that. he always goes out and then when the tab comes he says that he doesn't have any money!! we used to pick up the tab but now we leave him there!

 

[Landlocked]

I had a friend in high school that was known as the "Grilled Cheese Bandit".

He would walk into a Waffle House, order a grilled cheese sandwich, eat it, and walk out the door.

He's done it at nearly every waffle house south of birmingham.

 

[dirtdaddy]

this ones for the guys

God created Adam, and it was good for awhile, but Adam got board playing with all the animals and being by himself.
so he ask God can you create me someone to love, cook for me, take care of me,and talk to me often.
God said "i can do this for you Adam but it will cost you an arm and a leg".
Adam thought for a minute love ,cook ,take care of me,talk to me........an arm......a leg....hmmm
well God what can i get for a rib...and here we are!!!

 

[Kimmifunn]

i have a friend that would do something like that. he always goes out and then when the tab comes he says that he doesn't have any money!! we used to pick up the tab but now we leave him there!

At the Village Inn? Yum! I have gone to town there.
Who is it? Rick! :funn: