carson
Beach Fanatic
[h=2]Redneck Extreme [/h]You're An EXTREME Redneck When...
1 You let your 14-year-old daughter smokeat the dinner table in front of her kids.
2 The Blue Book value of your truck goes upand down depending on how much gas is in it.
3 You've been married three times and stillhave the same in-laws.
4 You think a woman who is out of yourleague bowls on a different night.
5 You wonder how service stations keeptheir rest-rooms so clean.
6 Someone in your family died right aftersaying, 'Hey, guys, watch this.'
7 You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8 Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by aceiling fan.
9 Your junior prom offered day care.
10. You think the last words of theStar-Spangled Banner are 'Gentlemen, start your engines.'
11. You lit a match in the bathroom andyour house exploded right off its wheels.
12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch hasmore teeth than your spouse.
13. You have to go outside to get somethingfrom the fridge.
14. One of your kids was born on a pooltable.
15. You need one more hole punched in yourcard to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
16. You can't get married to yoursweetheart because there's a law against it.
17. You think loading the dishwasher meansgetting your wife drunk.
And in closing....
Two good ol' boys in a Alabama trailer parkwere sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting offwork at the local Nissan plant.
After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd,"If'n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to yourwife while you was off huntin' and she got pregnant and had a baby, would thatmake us kin?"
The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for aminute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about thequestion. Finally, he says, "Well, I don't know about kin, but it wouldmake us even!"
NOWY'ALL HAVE A GOOD DAY
1 You let your 14-year-old daughter smokeat the dinner table in front of her kids.
2 The Blue Book value of your truck goes upand down depending on how much gas is in it.
3 You've been married three times and stillhave the same in-laws.
4 You think a woman who is out of yourleague bowls on a different night.
5 You wonder how service stations keeptheir rest-rooms so clean.
6 Someone in your family died right aftersaying, 'Hey, guys, watch this.'
7 You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8 Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by aceiling fan.
9 Your junior prom offered day care.
10. You think the last words of theStar-Spangled Banner are 'Gentlemen, start your engines.'
11. You lit a match in the bathroom andyour house exploded right off its wheels.
12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch hasmore teeth than your spouse.
13. You have to go outside to get somethingfrom the fridge.
14. One of your kids was born on a pooltable.
15. You need one more hole punched in yourcard to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
16. You can't get married to yoursweetheart because there's a law against it.
17. You think loading the dishwasher meansgetting your wife drunk.
And in closing....
Two good ol' boys in a Alabama trailer parkwere sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting offwork at the local Nissan plant.
After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd,"If'n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to yourwife while you was off huntin' and she got pregnant and had a baby, would thatmake us kin?"
The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for aminute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about thequestion. Finally, he says, "Well, I don't know about kin, but it wouldmake us even!"
NOWY'ALL HAVE A GOOD DAY
