Ahem, ahem, clear the aisles, please. I have a real illness to report. Two, in fact, though one is not human.
Daughter Philippa is home sick today. Too much socializing and too much homework have produced a sore throat. However, I am pleased to say that she was able to drag herself out of bed to shower and to apply copious amounts of cosmetics so she could "look good while she was feeling bad." I am happy to know that my daughter does not drop her standards when times are rough. ;-)
The inhuman illness might not be curable. I was awakened at the crack of dawn (aka "Miss Kitty time") by a desperate cry from the basement. "The fridge has failed!" Oh woe is Merman. He was referring to the motor of the basement fridge, the one that chills his beer.
Make that three illnesses today. Merman is going into DTs at the demise of his beer fridge.