Things Hallmark cards don't say....

[DD]

//////////////////////////////////////////////

My tire was thumping.



I thought it was flat



When I looked at the tire...



I noticed your cat.



Sorry!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Heard your wife left you,



How upset you must be.



But don't fret about it...



She moved in with me.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Looking back over the years



that we've been together,



I can't help but wonder...



"What the he!! was I thinking?"



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Congratulations on your wedding day!



Too bad no one likes your husband.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



How could two people as beautiful as you



Have such an ugly baby?



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



I've always wanted to have



someone to hold,



someone to love.



After having met you ..



I've changed my mind.



--------------------------------------

----------------------------------------------------------



I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.



I never believed in He!! until I met you.




////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
// ////////////////////////////////////////////



As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...



That you're not here to ruin it for me.



####################################################



Congratulations on your promotion.



Before you go...



Would you like to take this knife out of my back?



You'll probably need it again.




************************************************************************
** ******



Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!



(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Happy birthday! You look great for your age.



Almost Lifelike!



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



When we were together,



you always said you'd die for me.



Now that we've broken up,



I think it's time you kept your promise.




////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
// ////////////////////////////////////////////



We have been friends for a very long time ..



let's say we stop?



+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++



I'm so miserable without you



it's almost like you're here.



=====================================================



Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.



Did you ever find out who the father was?



%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%



Your friends and I wanted to do



something special for your birthday.



So we're having you put to sleep.




))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
)) ))))))))))))))))))))))



So your daughter's a hooker,



and it spoiled your day.



Look at the bright side,



it's really good pay.

 

[Miss Kitty]

:funn: I forget...were you drinking wine today????

 

[Allifunn]

...did you gulls make these up today???

 

[Miss Kitty]

...did you gulls make these up today???

These are from dd's new funn card line! Rita will be doing the visuals!!!

 

[Rita]

:clap_1: Funny!

 

[audie]

:clap_1: i could use a few of these !

 

[Teresa]

Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday.
So we're having you put to sleep.


I like this one the best!

 

[Allifunn]

Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday.
So we're having you put to sleep.


I like this one the best!

I knew you would...so do I

 

[Allifunn]

although I like this one too....LOL


I'm so miserable without you

it's almost like you're here.

 

[Teresa]

although I like this one too....LOL


I'm so miserable without you

it's almost like you're here.

Yes!! That is my other favorite (it's a tie). :clap_1: