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jdarg said:
Sure ya can. We are waiting!!!:shock: :shock: :shock: :popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:

Ok...this is not from Mr. dd--he's off downstairs yelling at the dog. But I have quite a few about one of my good friends whom we shall call Mary. Mary lives in a small town in Tx. and has led a somewhat sheltered life, but likes to think she's worldly. Anyway, she is the classic Texas beauty--perfect hair, make-up, everything color coordinated, etc. She never goes to the store without looking like she just stepped out of a fashion mag. Several years ago, she was dating this guy-a cowboy-who met her every expectation ;-) and she did everything in her power to impress him. He had horses at a stable outside of town and she went out to visit him while he rode. They had more than a few beers and she had to visit the little girls room. Except there was no little girls room, only a porta-potty. He pointed her in the right direction. By this time it was getting dark and no lights were to be found, so she just had to kinda "wing it". Her mother had always told her NEVER sit on the seat. She had on very tight jeans, so she just kinda had to hold herself up over the seat with her legs stretched out in front of her. She kept hearing this "splattering noise" and just kept stretching out. Finally, she finishes and while she's pulling up those tight jeans, turns around to see that the seat is down! All that "splattering" was on her jeans and feet! She came out and quickly excused herself and hoped that he didn't see anything in the dark. She never heard from him again :confused:
 
This thread has been hilarious. I like the older people stories too. I have one on my mom- funny she wasn't that old at the time, just ditsy.


When Will was a toddler, he spent 2 days a week at my parents while I was working. Mom had a big hole in the yard, and she announced to Dad and Bdarg that Will wouldn't stop climbing into "Mimi's big hole". My poor husband- I thought he was going to cough up a hairball.

When Will was still drinking a bottle, I bought certain types of nipples- the really soft rubber ones would fall apart, so I would buy the firmer ones. I was trying to explain the difference to Mom, but she kept interrupting over and over to say (loudly) "but my nipples are hard! My nipples are hard!"

Coming from the woman who said "Happy Mothers Day...all you mothers!"
 
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