Two poems - Funny!

[Miss Critter]

Got this in an email today and had to share.

A WOMAN'S POEM:​

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand.
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other.
And relish visits with my mother.





A MAN'S POEM:

I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with

big t!ts who owns a bar on a golf course,

and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This​

doesn't rhyme and I don't give a sh!t.

​

 

[Paula]

:funn:

Got this in an email today and had to share.

A WOMAN'S POEM:​

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand.
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other.
And relish visits with my mother.





A MAN'S POEM:

I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with

big t!ts who owns a bar on a golf course,

and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This​

doesn't rhyme and I don't give a sh!t.

​

That made my day, though I just had a nice big glass of wine on my porch to celebrate what I think will be my last warm porch day here in Michigan.

 

[AlphaCrab]

Got this in an email today and had to share.

A WOMAN'S POEM:​

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand.
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other.
And relish visits with my mother.





A MAN'S POEM:

I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with​

big t!ts who owns a bar on a golf course,​

and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This​

doesn't rhyme and I don't give a sh!t.

​

Are men that superficial and sexually objectivist, and slovenly? Well, not me--frankly, I strive to be the man in the women's poem.

 

[Paula]

Are men that superficial and sexually objectivist, and slovenly? Well, not me--frankly, I strive to be the man in the women's poem.

Well said, AlphaCrab. The poems still made me laugh, though, because I was taken by surprise when I got to the second poem.

 

[sunspotbaby]

:funn: oh, Lord hear my prayer....

 

[Miss Critter]

Well said, AlphaCrab. The poems still made me laugh, though, because I was taken by surprise when I got to the second poem.

Don't be fooled, Paula. Alphacrab is full of cr@p! You'll have to trust me on this one. ;-)

 

[Paula]

Well, MissCritter, that set of poems really made me spit out my wine with a good laugh and I haven't done that in a while. If I had been drinking milk, I think it would have come out my nose!