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Zen Wisdom

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kathydwells

Darlene is my middle name, not my nickname

  1. It's always darkest before dawn.
    So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.​
  2. Sex is like air -- it's not important unless you aren't getting any.​
  3. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments. ​
  4. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away, and you have their shoes. ​
  5. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. ​
  6. Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. ​
  7. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was worth it. ​
  8. Don't worry-- It only seems kinky the first time. ​
  9. Good judgment comes from bad experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. ​
  10. There are two theories about arguing with women.
    Neither one works.​
  11. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.​
  12. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.​
 
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